I am going to discuss different issues with you regarding how to approach the experience. The first one being the moral one. I am married. This one is the most difficult one to deal with. I have attempted to tell my wife, she doesn't want to hear it. It takes a lot of courage to take this step. Unfortunately for me it didn't work out in my favor. Talk of divorce, crying, my wife blaming herself. The feeling of bisexuallity really stems from inside. There is not much you can do to deprogram yourself from what turns you on. You can either choose to ignore it, Embrace it and do what you have to do or secretly have encounters. The secrecy is the most common I run into. Especially with married men. Nobody seems to cope with it very easy but there is always that desire to have the experience. Some men just don't care, I am not one of those. I am happy in my family life but sexually I need a little more than the average monogamous relationship. I am always cautious in how I go about it. I always use protection when needed. I try to be selective with whom I meet for sex.
Hey buddy, just discovered you by total accident and see you have only just begun your new blog. Welcome to the community of us bi/gay married bloggers who are all on this path to find some way to integrate our sexuality into our married lives, or face that perhaps we need to change something major in our lives if we are to be content. I will create a link to your blog. Tell us more about yourself in your writing, or your profile, or in e-mails to some of the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteYou seem at this point to be truly bisexual and having active sex with your wife, and I hope that can continue even as you explore this other side of yourself.
Welcome and good luck!
It's probably just my way of dealing with thing, and that is denial. I run my own business and I don't discuss things that happen there with my wife. When I meet guys, I don't tell her that either. I can keep things separate and I don't know if one day it's going to bite me, or this is going to become the new normal. I know the reason I do this is not to find a guy to run off with, but to be physical with. So I tell my self that I could stop at any moment, and go back to the way things were. For me it's like trying to find a best friend, that I also get physical with, so I'm very selective and screen guys on online sites to the point I run off most of them.
ReplyDeleteAs for telling my wife, I don't see that happening. I also don't see this side of me fulfilling needs that my wife provides, both phyiscal and emotional. Are there any active long term bi married guys, or does this path all lead to the same place?
Welcome to the dialog, where there are more questions than answers and no two people are the same.
I'm new , but realised I'm bi recently can't stop thinking of willies, playing with them. Would love to meet similar guys in my area. I agree with what you've said, being physical etc . I couldn't tell my wife either . I'm in my late 30's . Dark skinned.
DeleteSo far I have only have one safe buddy to play with and we have really bonded. It seemed weird at first but now it seems so natural. Back when I decided I had to try m2m sex I had also felt that I reached the final straw in regards to trying a have a normal relationship with my wife. In my case we have had two wonderful children together but never had good sex together. After I married her I discovered the mental illness she suffered from but effectively hid it from me. It only got worse and it has now caused her to have a host of other chronic bad health issues and obesity. Part of it is the illness but part of it is she is just plain lazy and won't try to help herself or confront her issues. She appreciates me to the extent that my income provides her meds and food. Anyway I feel no guilt in my situation. When I go to my buddy's house to have sex with him it is no different than going hunting with my regular friends. My sex buddy has a sexually dead wife also. Its a shame because she doesn't know the pleasure she is missing. I have now experienced levels of pleasure I didn't know existed with my buddy's help. Except for my first girl friend I had my first extended sexual relationship with. Strangely my new guy relationship has been progressing similarly as my first girl relationship. Exploring each others bodies, having passionate sex and bonding. instead of lusting after my girlfriend's breasts and warm vagina, I lust for my buddy's hard cock and semen. We care for each other as good trusting friends but I am not getting feelings for him in a romantic way like my first woman. After all the bad women I have had experiences with I doubt I will ever feel romance again with anyone.
ReplyDeleteyou only have one life and you must live it true to yourself otherwise anything else is just a lie. If you must do it in secrecy then so be it.
ReplyDelete